31 October 2013

there is light


I think we are here. On the other side. Where there is more light than dark. A place where my baby is no longer in chronic pain. With probiotics (I'll be singing their praises for the rest of my life), an overdue silent reflux diagnosis, and another month under her digestive system's belt - Anabel does a lot more smiling and a lot less crying. I was told long before I even planned to have children, that I would be the voice for my kids. That has always stuck with me. 



For the past two months, so many people have told me what was wrong with my baby or what my child needs. That she just had "colic." That some babies "just scream all the time." That she was just a "high demand," "hot tempered," or a "high needs" baby. Or in other words, not a "good baby." In my heart, I knew that wasn't true. And seeing how easy going and undeniably happy she is with the help she needed, what I knew to be true is confirmed. I have never seen a more calm, content, incredibly sweet baby than Ana now. She talks and sings to us. She tries so hard to laugh. Her body no longer stiffens, and she no longer writhes in discomfort. She sleeps soundly, sometimes wrapped up near my chest in the sling, or just draped across my stomach. Something that was unheard of before. She isn't frightened in other peoples' arms anymore. She still makes her needs known, but now she does so without panic. It isn't easy by any means - but my girl finally feels good, and this normal "hard" is something I have been longing for.


I mean, just look at her.

12 comments:

  1. I feel like I'm constantly saying/thinking this, but really--soso happy for you, your dreamy babe, and your dreamy lil family. Motherhood looks pretty swell on you, girl.

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  2. seriously, i don't remember a n'tima that wasn't a mama. it's as though you've always been one and that anabel has always been here for you to nurture. you two are the sweetest ♥

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  3. So glad you're finding a brighter, more peaceful place--it suits you both so well. Something you may consider if she has reflux problems again when she's older may be testing for food intolerances (though I by no means intend to be another preachy voice...I had reflux all my life, and when they discovered that was the root cause, it was so life changing, to say the least). Wishing you the greatest health, happiness, + love in your beautiful family!

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  4. We went through the exact same thing with our daughter. The first three weeks were hell, and I wanted to punch people in the throat every time I heard them say "some babies just cry". Not like this, not in utter agony. So glad you guys were able to find her some peace. For us, the battle (with meds and finding out she had an allergy to rice after one dr suggested we put baby rice in her bottle) took 10 months to get her to where she wasn't constantly struggling to breathe and not choking on her own vomit (which once sent us to the ER). You are her voice.
    Good work momma, keep it up.

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  5. She is amazing and you guys are too. I've said it before and I'll say it again - you bowl me over with your insight and genuine heart. Ana is a very lucky girl. You will most definitely be her voice and you have a strong one; never be afraid to use it and speak up whenever you feel so inclined. And by the way, she has to be one of the cutest babies I've seen in a long time!

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  6. Gosh, I went through exactly the same thing a couple months ago and my baby is only four months now. It was hell. Hell. No one could help us - no doctor, no family or friend. No advice. It was all on me to research things and listen to my intuition. And just like you, once I got him on medication (no longer on it thankfully) and once he hit that 3 month mark things just started to get so much easier and he was a much happier baby.

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  7. hurray! she is perfect! way to go- mom always knows best!

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  8. She is perfection. What a doll. I am glad she is doing better!

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  9. What a beautiful family and blog. Thank you for sharing your story. I have a 3.5 month old daughter ans everything you say is just extremely close to what we are going through. Love.

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  10. Everything you wrote about is what we experienced with my almost 4 month old daughter. I knew the "colic" term was not what was going on with my Brynlee. Finally with the help of probiotics and the right meds, we also are entering a new season. You took the words out of my mouth when you said "this normal "hard" is something I have been longing for."

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