I think we are here. On the other side. Where there is more light than dark. A place where my baby is no longer in chronic pain. With probiotics (I'll be singing their praises for the rest of my life), an overdue silent reflux diagnosis, and another month under her digestive system's belt - Anabel does a lot more smiling and a lot less crying. I was told long before I even planned to have children, that I would be the voice for my kids. That has always stuck with me.
For the past two months, so many people have told me what was wrong with my baby or what my child needs. That she just had "colic." That some babies "just scream all the time." That she was just a "high demand," "hot tempered," or a "high needs" baby. Or in other words, not a "good baby." In my heart, I knew that wasn't true. And seeing how easy going and undeniably happy she is with the help she needed, what I knew to be true is confirmed. I have never seen a more calm, content, incredibly sweet baby than Ana now. She talks and sings to us. She tries so hard to laugh. Her body no longer stiffens, and she no longer writhes in discomfort. She sleeps soundly, sometimes wrapped up near my chest in the sling, or just draped across my stomach. Something that was unheard of before. She isn't frightened in other peoples' arms anymore. She still makes her needs known, but now she does so without panic. It isn't easy by any means - but my girl finally feels good, and this normal "hard" is something I have been longing for.
I mean, just look at her.